Learning To Say “No”
“Sure, I’ll help you with that.”
“Yes, I’ll do that for you.”
“No problem at all.”
“No, I don’t mind.”
Does this sound familiar to you? Are you always saying “yes” when you really want to say, “Are you kidding me? I don’t have time for that! There are only 24 hours in a day!”
If you’re anything like me, saying no is just about as painful as getting a tooth pulled. I always want to lend a helping hand or offer support, but my to-do list is getting way out of hand. I have to learn to say “no” sometimes and without the guilt. Here are some pointers to help us both lessen our loads and practice saying NO:
Know who and what your priorities are and plan accordingly. If you’re asked to do something that doesn’t align with your priorities, you may need to evaluate and respectfully decline. Be sure that YOU are on your list of priorities. Make time to do things you enjoy and spend time with the people who are important to you.
You don’t always have to justify saying no. It is your prerogative to decide what works for you and what does not.
Take some time to consider
You don’t have to give an answer right away. Take some time to mull over your schedule and your priorities to decide if you want to do what’s being asked of you.
“I can’t do that because…”
Sometimes, especially with family or close friends, you may find it necessary to explain your response. If so, keep your explanation short and to the point. If you go on and on about it, your explanation may begin to sound more like an excuse.
Trust your instincts.
If your gut Is telling you to back away from a new venture or a special project at work, listen! You know your limitations. If it’s not feasible now, maybe it will be later.
If you are feeling overwhelmed and can’t seem to get a handle on managing your responsibilities, talking to a mental health professional may help you gain clarity. Call us at Amy Wine Counseling Center today. We can be reached at 832-421-8714 or contact us here.
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