Let's Get Factual!

“He’s such a narcissist.” “Stop gaslighting me.” “That triggered me.” “I’m OCD.” “She’s bipolar.” 

In recent years, conversations around mental health have become more prevalent. Once considered taboo to discuss, mental health topics are now commonplace across social media and various other platforms. While this is an encouraging step toward reducing stigma and supporting those affected, there have been some unanticipated pitfalls - namely, misinformation about what certain terms mean.

Let’s look at some examples where these terms “fit the facts” of the situation:

“Narcissist”

We often hear this term being used to describe just about anyone who someone does not agree with or dislikes. Narcissism is a personality trait that essentially has two prongs: 1) The person has an excessive interest in themselves and their own wants and needs, and 2) the person neglects or disregards the needs of others. The truth is, everyone displays narcissistic traits from time to time- maybe having an inflated ego or pursuing one’s wants and needs at the expense of someone else. Narcissistic personality disorder, however, is the condition that describes a persistent, life-long pattern of behavior that embodies the aforementioned features, consistently and explicitly without remorse. 

“Gaslighting”

If someone gives you criticism or disagrees with you, they aren’t gaslighting you. Gaslighting is a form of emotional abuse and describes patterned manipulation and control tactics by one person (the abuser) towards another (the victim).  Typically, the goal or motivation behind these tactics is to make the victim dependent on the abuser by causing the victim to question their own sense of reality. The victim often becomes confused when their abuser denies things that happened, minimizes and invalidates the victim’s feelings, or questions the victim’s thinking- all different tactics used by the abuser used over prolonged periods of time. If you know someone who may be in an abusive relationship, it is best to consult with a professional before talking to the victim about getting out of the relationship (this could lead to the abuser escalating tactics).  

“Triggered”

This term is often misused when a more accurate term would be “uncomfortable” or “upset.” Just because someone feels upset or uncomfortable by something does not mean they are triggered. A trigger (in mental health terms) is something- a stimulus- that activates or worsens mental health symptoms. This can relate to trauma triggers- where a person relives or reacts to a past traumatic experience in the present- or it can be something that exacerbates symptoms like anxiety or panic. There are many therapeutic interventions that can help a person with their triggers. 

“OCD”

A person who likes things tidy, organized, or is very particular about certain things does not necessarily have OCD. Many people have traits that are associated with OCD. Obsessive compulsive disorder is a mental health condition whereby the person experiences distressing intrusive thoughts, images, or urges and then feels compelled to complete a task of some kind (can be mental) to alleviate the distress. Generally, the person feels temporary relief after performing the task, but the cycle continues to happen. OCD can be very debilitating and can interfere with a person’s daily routine and cause stress on interpersonal relationships. OCD is best treated by a combination of medication and therapy. 

“Bipolar”

Just because a person has mood swings- even significant ones- does not mean they have bipolar disorder. Bipolar disorder is a mood disorder with the presence of depressive episodes and “manic” episodes (or hypomanic, a less severe form of mania). Manic episodes are characterized by significantly elevated mood, energy, irritability, and activity levels. One major component of a manic episode is impulsive, often reckless, behaviors. Bipolar disorder can be extremely debilitating, often causing ruptures in interpersonal relationships or severe consequences to actions carried out during a manic episode. Bipolar disorder is best treated by a combination of medication and therapy.

Mental health conditions are complex and have a significant impact on the lives of not only the individuals who have the conditions, but also on their families. The words we use- whether in everyday conversation, media, or online- have the power to shape public perception and individual experiences. Let’s use that power for good! Being mindful with mental health terminology isn’t about being politically correct- it’s about being compassionate and informed.

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Katie Dufour, LMSW, LCDC

Counseling is helpful because it allows us to take a step back to get a better view and understanding of what is going on, how we got to where we are, and how do we move forward to create a meaningful life worth living. My approach to counseling is to create a collaborative relationship with my clients, because, at the end of the day, no amount of degrees and certifications and trainings can trump the fact that YOU are the expert on YOU!